In the late 1970’s a financially independent English family used their resources to commission a study to determine the safest place in the world. Once they learned that their study revealed that the safest place was the Falkland Islands, they moved there. Ironically, shortly after this family relocated, they were evacuated during the Agentinian invasion! I was reminded of this story as I was reading the 1941 Caldecott Winner, Make Way For Ducklings and reflecting how I related to this children’s book.
The story begins with Mr. and Mrs. Mallard looking for a safe place to bring into the world their little ducklings. Wherever they flew, Mrs. Mallard continued to see the possibility for danger: If they lived in the woods, they could be attacked by wolves or if they lived by the water, they could be frightened by turtles. Then they rested at a pond in the Public Gardens. She was just beginning to relax and think this location could be the best choice when she was nearly hit by a young child riding his bike rather recklessly.
Greg and I have tried so hard this past year to make our home a safe place to enhance my healing environment. We have taken out carpets and replaced them with cork flooring, we have repainted most of our house with low VOC paints, and we have installed an air filtration system in our bedroom. And that just describes the larger changes we have made. Like the English couple and Mrs. Mallard who both found a safe quiet isolated island, we were beginning to believe that we had created a safe place for me to heal.
The problem is that living in such a bubble is not exactly exciting – there are no adventures, no new things to stimulate the five senses. And that is why once her ducklings were born, and after Mrs. Mallord spent some time teaching them how to swim, dive and follow her, she decided they needed to leave. I suspect she began to long for the sights, the sounds, the people, the swans, the occasional feeding of peanuts, the energy – the invigorating pulse of the Public Garden. At least that is what I surmise. Anyways they proceeded to have an adventure as the ducklings followed their mother walking across the highway heading toward the Public Garden. Even though I usually don’t feel well enough to leave my home very often, I still miss participating in various activities. Recently, I went into Children’s Place Outlet and I just stood there almost overly stimulated as I watched the children interact with their parents, as I observed the long line to the cashier due to a sale, and I just enjoyed wandering touching and looking at all the colors of the clothing. Going into most stores usually are very problematic since I have so many environmental sensitivities. However, for some reason there is less risk for me walking into this Children’s Clothing Store. Again I think of Mrs. Mallard and her little ducklings. She was not prepared to put them in great danger and have them live there just newly born, but even before they could fly there she was prepared to take some risks and move them there. And that is what most of us who are chronically ill do on a regular basis. We weigh the pros and cons of leaving our safe home and we are compelled sometimes to take risks regarding our health because we want to feel like we are engaged with the rest of the world. However, we often lean on our loved ones to help us do that – often by their being with us on our adventure or they nurse us if our health has been greatly jeopardized upon our return! They are like the policeman who helped Mrs. Mallard and her ducklings get to their destination safely .
However, yesterday I was reminded again that no matter how much we try to find a safe place to live, no matter how much we try to get better, no matter how we try to control the amount of risks we take, we really don’t have that much control concerning our safe environment and our wellness.. To add to my already long list of symptoms, I just learned that I have endometrial cancer and now I need a hysterectomy. I have been having so many setbacks that I am not looking forward to having this surgery. Like the English couple who were invaded on the Falkland Island, I feel like I have been invaded by abnormal cells and I don’t feel like my safe healing environment is very safe at all! However, as I think of the picture of the Mother duck and her ducklings boldly walking through many dangers just to get to the Public Garden, I believe I can imitate them by boldly walking through this experience and who knows eventually I may be able to spend less time in my home and more time at my own very active and very scenic Public Garden!
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